For dad only:
Prayer Cover
Paul was preaching his heart out to the church in Troas when a young man named Eutychus fell out of the window. Of course the parents of the boy were all upset and ran frantically to him, calling his name and trying to get him to wake up. Sometimes I think I am that parent: my child goes down and I do not handle the situation very well at all.
How not to respond when your child is down
I want to talk to him. I want to yell at him, “Why did you fall? Why were you sleeping when you should have been listening?” And on and on. Your parents probably did it to you and you have done it to your kids.
When Eutychus fell it was his own dumb fault. He knew better, but when the kid is laying there lifeless and not breathing, yelling won’t help now. Yelling at my child after he has blown it will not make him wake up and want to live. It takes something more.
How to respond when your child is down
Paul came running outside, threw himself over the child (Acts 20:7-10). I am sure he breathed a prayer or commanded life back into the body. Suddenly, the boy came to life and Paul handed him back to his parents.
This is the best approach to a child who is going through tough times either socially, emotionally, or spiritually. Lecturing will not work while he is down. If he is spiritually asleep, pray until he awakens. If he is heading downward to a path of destruction, do what Paul did: fall on your face and cover him with prayer.
A prayer cover over your child
You cannot lecture a fallen soul back into the Saviour’s arms. You have to pray until the Lord moves his soul and breaths life back into him.
When was the last time you quit nagging or swooning over your child and just fell on your face in prayer?
How much more effective would your interactions with your older child be if you covered him in prayer everyday instead of laying on more blame and criticism?
Restore your child. Lift your sons and daughters up in prayer. Cover them every day with prayer and weeping. Then get off your face and great them with a smile each morning. Let them see the joy of the Lord in you. Instead of condemnation, let them see love. Let the Spirit of the Lord guide you in saying and doing things that bring them to a heart of consecration to the Savior.
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Read this to the kids:
A High-five for Your Face
Last time Rusty and Misty got to meet their cousins for a few hours.
Dad stood up and said, “How about we go out and get some ice cream?”
Rusty and Misty’s cousins started hopping up and down, one was saying he had to have chocolate and the other said she wanted the ice cream with bubble gum in it.
Rusty and Misty both felt glad just to get out of the house. They slipped outside first while the parents talked their way out the door and took their time getting the little kids ready to go out.
Misty walked over to the bush where they had seen the baby birds earlier. The mother bird flew away as she approached the nest.
Rusty scolded her, “Misty, don’t go over there or Sally will see you.” He did not talk too loudly becaue Sally and Jimmy might hear and come see the baby birds.
“I just want to see them again. I’ll be quick.”
“No,” he whispered as he heard voices coming onto the front porch. “Get away from there.”
He tried to tug at Misty’s jacket, but she shoved her elbow into his ribs.
“Ouch.”
“Well, leave me alone.”
“Hey,” Sally said, “what are you looking at over there?”
“None of your business,” Rusty said.
“Who says?” she asked. “Oh, is that a nest of little chickie birds?”
“Yes, and stay away from them,” Rusty demanded.
“Why?” Sally said, putting her hands on her hips. “They are on my property. I can see them if I want.”
“You’ll probably kill them or something,” Rusty said, standing in her way.
“Uuhh!” she swung and slapped Rusty in the mouth.
Their parents on the porch saw the commotion. Auntie ran over to Sally. “What was that for, young lady?”
“He won’t let me see my birds—he said I would kill them.”
Auntie frowned at Rusty. Rusty looked up to see Dad frowning at him. Dad took Rusty out to the van and had a talk with him while Mom and Auntie helped Sally and Jimmy see the little birds.
“Sally you and Jimmy know to be nice to little birds don’t you?” Mom asked.
They both nodded their heads.
“They still need their momma to bring them food until they can fly.”
“They don’t have wings?” Jimmy asked.
“They don’t have any feathers yet,” Mom explained. “We don’t want to touch them.”
“Are they yucky?” Jimmy asked.
“Not really,” Mom said, “but if we touch them, the momma bird can smell our scent and might go away for good. Then they would starve to death. That would be sad, wouldn’t it?”
Jimmy and Sally nodded their heads. The birds had started cheeping for their mother.
“They’re singing a funny song,” Jimmy said.
Auntie said, “They are crying for their mommy.”
The kids laughed. They all headed toward their vehicles.
When they all got to the ice cream place, Jimmy ran ahead and put his hands all over the glass, trying to see all the colors that could be scooped. Some teenagers came in and walked up to place their order. They knew what they wanted, and the lady behind the counter asked for their choices. Rusty saw that they were getting ahead of his family’s group so he put his hands on top of the glass display and said, “I want pistachio.”
The lady looked at Rusty then at the teenagers and raised her eyebrows.
“Looks like the kid here is really needing some ice cream,” one of the teenagers said, laughing.
“He can wait,” Mom said, putting her hand on Rusty’s shoulder, “you all go ahead. We still have young ones to decide for.”
Misty took the longest to decide on a flavor and by the time she made up her mind everyone else already had theirs.
Mom, Dad, and Auntie all sat at one table with the baby while Rusty, Misty, Sally, and Jimmy sat at their own table. The adults were talking, but the kids just licked their treats.
Jimmy’s ice cream cone began to drip onto the table.
“You’re making a mess,” Sally told him. Their mom did not seem to notice.
One of the restaurant workers came walking by.
Sally said, “Um, we need a napkin.”
The worker glanced at her and kept on walking.
“We need a napkin here,” Sally said a little louder but the worker did not look back.
Sally huffed and went back to licking her cone.
Jimmy looked at the drips on the table. Then he bent over and licked them up.
“Gross!” Rusty said, “Don’t lick off the table! That is sick, man.”
“You can’t tell me what to do,” Jimmy said, “you aren’t my mom. I don’t have to listen to you.”
“Don’t lick off the table,” Rusty ordered.
Jimmy scowled at him and showed his fist. “Do you want me to punch you?”
Rusty shook his head and sighed.
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Now discuss it!
How did Rusty get himself slapped by his cousin?
Should she have slapped him?
How did Mom set a good example compared to Rusty’s mistake?
What does Proverbs 18:6-7 say about talking wisely? What do you think Rusty needs to learn from this verse?
How does he need to improve in how he speaks to Misty? To Sally?
How about in how he jumped ahead of the teenagers to place his order? What should he have done different?
How about the way he spoke to Jimmy? Do you think his mouth was calling for punches? Even though Jimmy was doing wrong, what could Rusty have done better?
Why do you think the restaurant worker ignored Sally’s demand for a napkin?
When have you felt like punching someone for something they said? Should we feel this way toward people?
When have you made others want to punch you because of your words?
Whose nerves do you get on? How can you improve?
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Read God’s Word together:
Answering Emotional Ephraim
When the three hundred blew the trumpets, the LORD set every man’s sword against his companion throughout the whole camp; and the army fled to Beth Acacia, toward Zererah, as far as the border of Abel Meholah, by Tabbath. And the men of Israel gathered together from Naphtali, Asher, and all Manasseh, and pursued the Midianites.
Then Gideon sent messengers throughout all the mountains of Ephraim, saying, “Come down against the Midianites, and seize from them the watering places as far as Beth Barah and the Jordan.”
Then all the men of Ephraim gathered together and seized the watering places as far as Beth Barah and the Jordan. And they captured two princes of the Midianites, Oreb and Zeeb. They killed Oreb at the rock of Oreb, and Zeeb they killed at the winepress of Zeeb. They pursued Midian and brought the heads of Oreb and Zeeb to Gideon on the other side of the Jordan.
Now the men of Ephraim said to him, “Why have you done this to us by not calling us when you went to fight with the Midianites?” And they reprimanded him sharply.
So he said to them, “What have I done now in comparison with you? Is not the gleaning of the grapes of Ephraim better than the vintage of Abiezer? God has delivered into your hands the princes of Midian, Oreb and Zeeb. And what was I able to do in comparison with you?”
Then their anger toward him subsided when he said that.
So Jephthah advanced toward the people of Ammon to fight against them, and the LORD delivered them into his hands. And he defeated them from Aroer as far as Minnith — twenty cities — and to Abel Keramim, with a very great slaughter. Thus the people of Ammon were subdued before the children of Israel.
Then the men of Ephraim gathered together, crossed over toward Zaphon, and said to Jephthah, “Why did you cross over to fight against the people of Ammon, and did not call us to go with you? We will burn your house down on you with fire!”
And Jephthah said to them, “My people and I were in a great struggle with the people of Ammon; and when I called you, you did not deliver me out of their hands. So when I saw that you would not deliver me, I took my life in my hands and crossed over against the people of Ammon; and the LORD delivered them into my hand. Why then have you come up to me this day to fight against me?”
Now Jephthah gathered together all the men of Gilead and fought against Ephraim.
(Judges 7:22-25; 8:1-3; 11:32-33; 12:1-4, NKJV)
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Let’s talk about it!
Doesn’t it sound like Ephraim had a problem with showing up only after a job was finished?
How did Gideon handle their accusation well?
He told them their part in capturing the leaders named Oreb and Zeeb was far greater than what he had done. This calmed them down and they did not try to fight him.
How did Jephthah do an awful job of dealing with the emotional Ephraimites?
Ephraim was of the same family as the rest of the nation of Israel. Sometimes your own family—brothers, sisters, or cousins—can get on your nerves. How do speak kindly and not start fights?
Have you been like Jephthah before, saying things that made people want to hit you? What did you do to start it? How did you solve it?
Role play: In church/school, your brother/sister answers a question wrong and you want to correct him/her. How do you think they feel when others laugh at their mistakes? How can you help correct someone without making them look bad?
It is your turn at the drinking fountain but some other kid jumps in ahead of you. How do you respond kindly so as not to start a fight? Should you just be quiet all the time and let people do wrong or mean things?
How did Jesus speak wisely to people who wanted Him to make them mad and start a fight?
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Memorize it!
Proverbs 18:6-7
A fool’s lips enter into contention,
and his mouth calleth for strokes.
A fool’s mouth is his destruction,
and his lips are the snare of his soul.