Silent Lying (3 of 3)

For DAD Only:

How to Catch a Liar

Kids don’t just lie to stay out of trouble.  They also like to lie get good stuff.  The key to good parenting is not to just think of the adult you want your child to become, but also, don’t forget the child you once were.  In other words with one eye, look to the future, with the other, keep the past in view. But watch out for that skateboard on the driveway, too.

You know what it was like to be a kid who wanted to get out of work, stay out of trouble, and get all the candy possible.  Your children won’t be much removed.  In fact, they will revisit many of your past sins on you.

A few years ago, I was sure one of my kids was lying, but I couldn’t believe it.  All the facts incriminated him.  All his words and actions exonerated him.  What do you do?  You don’t want to punish an innocent person!  So, I set a trap.  I set up an irresistible situation. Then I hid and watched.  Sure enough, he did exactly what I thought he’d been doing.  I didn’t want to believe it, but my eyes weren’t lying.

Rather than bust out and blow my cover, I waited until the coast was clear (like a good detective).  Then I confronted him.  “I didn’t do it.”  This time I looked him in the eye and said, “You are lying.”  Of course, like a hardened criminal, he acted totally innocent.

It only takes a couple of these “traps” for a child to begin to believe that God is telling you everything.  Hey, that doesn’t hurt either, after all, the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.

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Dad, share this story with your kids:

Fake Out

Rusty volunteered to help Mom and his friend Joshie fix the trampled flowers in front of the house.  Mom had purchased some small plants and set them beside the flower bed.  Rusty and little Joshie put some yard tools from the garage in the wheelbarrow and brought them around the front of the house.

“Thank you, boys,” she said.  “Now, let’s pull out all the broken flowers.”

Rusty bent over the flower bed alongside his mother, and they pulled out the limp, broken flowers and set them in the wheelbarrow.

“May I get the watta hose?” Joshie asked.

“Yes,” Rusty’s Mom said.  “Just pull it out front here and make sure it has the spray nozzle on it.”

Joshie disappeared around the corner.

“Do we have to pull up all of the flowers?” Rusty asked.

“No,” Mom said.  “Just these that are badly broken.  The ones on the other side of the bush still look pretty good.”

“Will these new plants put out flowers soon?” Rusty asked.

Mom dropped some dead flowers in the wheelbarrow and sighed.  “No, it will probably take a few weeks before we see flowers on this side of the house again.”

Joshie came around the corner with the hose in his hand.  He pointed the nozzle at Rusty and his mom.  “Guys, wook out.  I’m going to soak ya’!”

“Joshie, put that down!” Mom said.

Joshie laughed and lowered the nozzle.  “I got ya’.”  He raised it at them again.  “Wook out!”

Mom walked over and took the spray nozzle out of his hand.

“I was just pwetending.”

Mom bent down and looked into Joshie’s eyes.  “It’s good to pretend fun things, but we don’t pretend to do mean things.  Now, let’s get some holes dug so we can put in these new plants.”

The three of them worked together digging little holes, taking the little plants out of their plastic containers, and putting them in the ground.  Joshie did a good job of packing the dirt around the new plants.

Once they had put all the plants in the holes, Mom picked up the hose again and sprayed it lightly over the new flowers.  When she finished, Joshie scooped up a glob of mud.  He packed it together, and then raised his arm back, as if he would throw it at Rusty.

“Don’t!” Rusty yelled.

Joshie laughed.  “You wooked scawed, Wusty!”

“I don’t want mud in my face,” Rusty said.

“What did I tell you about pretending to do mean things?” Mom asked Rusty’s friend.

“Sowwy.”  The mudball plopped back into the flowerbed.

The three workers cleaned up the tools and picked up the trash from their project.

“Hey, I have an idea,” Rusty said.  “I’ll be right back!”  He dashed off, into the house.  In a minute he was back with an armload of flowers.

“What are those?” Mom asked.

“Plastic flowers from that project we did.”

“I can see that, but…”

“And I thought we could stick them in the flower bed so people see pretty flowers when they drive by. Just until the new ones bloom.”

Mom looked at Rusty and smiled.  “That’s a crazy idea, but I like it.  The front of the house won’t look so lopsided that way.”

Joshie, Rusty, and Mom poked the happy looking flowers into the dirt.  Just as they finished, Dad’s truck pulled into the driveway.  He got out and looked at the flower bed.  “Plastic flowers?  What are you guys doing?”

“It’s a long story,” Mom explained.  Dad walked with them to the garage as they explained the whole thing.

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How could Joshie’s “pretending” be a type of lying?

What other ways do people lie with their actions?

Is it just as wrong to deceive with our actions as it is to lie with our words?

Was it wrong for them to put plastic flowers out front?  How is that different from lying?

What are some things that kids do to imitate bad people to look cool?

Dancing moves, pretending to smoke or drink, acting like they are shooting people

What kind of bad things happen when we deceive people with our actions?

Role play: Your mom knows that your friends have come down with bad colds.  She’s worried that you might.  You know that if you wake up and complain about feeling sick, you won’t have to do school.  You might even get some extra orange juice.  What should you do?

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Read the following scripture with the family:

Deceptive Actions

Joshua 9:3-16

But when the inhabitants of Gibeon heard what Joshua had done to Jericho and Ai, they worked craftily, and went and pretended to be ambassadors. And they took old sacks on their donkeys, old wineskins torn and mended, old and patched sandals on their feet, and old garments on themselves; and all the bread of their provision was dry and moldy.

And they went to Joshua, to the camp at Gilgal, and said to him and to the men of Israel, “We have come from a far country; now therefore, make a covenant with us.”

Then the men of Israel said to the Hivites, “Perhaps you dwell among us; so how can we make a covenant with you?”

But they said to Joshua, “We are your servants.”

And Joshua said to them, “Who are you, and where do you come from?”

So they said to him: “From a very far country your servants have come, because of the name of the LORD your God; for we have heard of His fame, and all that He did in Egypt, and all that He did to the two kings of the Amorites who were beyond the Jordan–to Sihon king of Heshbon, and Og king of Bashan, who was at Ashtaroth.

“Therefore our elders and all the inhabitants of our country spoke to us, saying, ‘Take provisions with you for the journey, and go to meet them, and say to them, “We are your servants; now therefore, make a covenant with us.”‘ This bread of ours we took hot for our provision from our houses on the day we departed to come to you. But now look, it is dry and moldy.  And these wineskins which we filled were new, and see, they are torn; and these our garments and our sandals have become old because of the very long journey.”

Then the men of Israel took some of their provisions; but they did not ask counsel of the LORD.  So Joshua made peace with them, and made a covenant with them to let them live; and the rulers of the congregation swore to them.

And it happened at the end of three days, after they had made a covenant with them, that they heard that they were their neighbors who dwelt near them.

New King James Version, © 1983 Thomas Nelson.  Used with permission.

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What do you think of these guys tricking God’s leader?

How would you have felt if you were Joshua and the leaders of Israel?

What ways do people do things to impress people to think something about them that is not true?

Do people do things with their clothes to create a false image?

Do they do things to their hair to put on an impression?

How do people use makeup and jewelry to create a deceptive image?

Do you think Jesus ever put on a false image?

God’s people are to represent Him.  We are to be the image of God to the world.  How do you think He feels if we put on an impression of something else?

When have you ever created a false impression to get out of something bad?  Or to get something good?

How would you do things differently now?

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Memory Verse

Proverbs 13:5

A righteous man hateth lying:

but a wicked man is loathsome,

and cometh to shame.