For dad only:
The Danger of Going to Church
Church can be one of the worst places to take children. Of course, I believe we have to be part of the church to please God and thrive in the faith. You and your children will not grow in God if you do not have teachers and preachers leading you in the local church (Ephesians 4:11-12). However, foolish people at church can make the church building one of the most hazardous places for your kids.
The problem of not knowing there is a problem
People can grow up in the world seeing and experiencing all kinds of sin as children. When they come to the Lord, the often think their own children are safe because they are not raising them the way they were raised. What they foolishly forget, however, is that kids invent sin.
You cannot stand talking in the foyer of the church for an hour while your kids run wild all over the church campus. Sin will creep in somewhere. Do you want your kids to be another horror story of bullying, exposure to pornography, or molestation in a back classroom at the church?
Steps to safeguard your children
Keep your eye on them. Kids have parents because they do not know what they should avoid. If you are not within earshot and cannot see them, any kid could make them pull down their pants or show them a filthy picture. Do not send your kids to church events if you are not confident they will have close supervision. Volunteer as a chaperon. A bent sapling rarely grows a straight tree.
Know the difference between caution and suspicion
Do not give your kids the impression that everyone at church is a pedophile. Do tell them to keep their eyes open.
One Sunday I noticed I had not seen my two young children for a few minutes. I burst into a nursery room to find a young adult talking to them. Everything seemed fine, but if I had not been alert who knows what would have happened. Later, we learned he had molested six other kids.
Relax and enjoy church fellowship, but use wisdom.
_________
You want your church to be a safe place for any child. Now you can be sure it is when you follow the simple plan laid out in the book Safe Kids: Policies and Procedures for Protecting Children in the Church
_________
Read this story to your kids:
We are Part of a Big Family
Last time, Rusty and Misty’s family was going in to see Grandpa after a mild heart attack. Before they came to his room, they heard an alarm in the hallway that indicated he might be dying. Things have settled down now.
“Can we go in and see him now?” Rusty asked.
Dad’s face looked pale. The color had not come back after the scare of almost losing his father. “Not yet son.” He put his arm around Rusty’s shoulder.
They were all especially quiet after Grandpa had set off the code blue alarm. Dad had been going in and out of the room once they let him in again. He did not tell Rusty and Misty everything that happened, but they knew enough to be scared.
“Dad?” Misty said, “when will Pastor be here?”
“Any minute—oh! There he is now.” Dad pulled away from the family to greet the pastor of their church. Another man from the church had come along, and Dad stood talking to them both for a minute. The three men started for Grandpa’s room, when Dad turned and motioned for them to follow.
In Grandpa’s room, Rusty looked around at the monitors, tubes, and beeping machines. Grandpa seemed to smile even though he was sleeping. The pastor asked a few questions and talked with Grandma for a while, making sure she was okay. She told him about his blood pressure dropping to almost nothing and how his face turned gray.
Misty had been listening to them talk about the details of Grandpa almost dying. When the adults paused for a moment, she asked, “Is Grandpa going to die?” Tears spurted from her eyes. “I don’t want to lose my grandpa.”
Mom put her arm around Misty and the pastor patted her head. “Why don’t we all join hands and pray together?”
They linked up shoulder to shoulder and hand in hand. Pastor and Grandma put their hands on Grandpa’s.
“Lord God, we ask your blessings on this family. Bring your Spirit into this room and give them strength through this trial. We thank you for our brother, Lord. Restore his strength and bring him up from this bed. Give our sister joy as she goes through this valley with her husband. Touch this precious family with your hope, Lord. Let them come to know you better as you bring our brother out of this room very soon. We ask all these things in the name of Jesus.”
• • •
Later, Rusty, Misty, and Mom were on the elevator, coming back from the cafeteria.
“Do you think Grandpa is awake yet?” he asked.
“Yes. Dad called me and said he was talking and doing well. We are going to go visit him before we go home.”
“Good,” Misty yawned as the elevator doors opened, “I am really tired.”
In the hallway, they saw a few people gathered in front of Grandpa’s room.
“Who are those people?” she asked.
Mom said, “Folks from church. You know them. They have come up to see how Grandpa is doing.”
“Oh! Are there any kids from church here?”
Mom shook her head as they peeked into Grandpa’s doorway. The few older couples from church who had stopped in had crowded his room. She motioned for Rusty and Misty to sit down in the chairs outside the room until they could get in to talk to Grandpa.
After a few minutes of waiting, Rusty asked, “Why did all these people have to come? He’s our Grandpa.”
Mom frowned at him. “Shame on you, Rusty. I know you are tired, but watch your attitude. These people are family, too.”
“They are?”
“Yes. Church family.”
“That’s not the same.”
“Young man, I am not going to argue with you. You may not understand right now, but your church family is every bit as important as your real family. Sometimes even more so. Grandpa does not have any brothers or sisters who serve God. His church family means more to him, right now.”
Grandma stepped out of the room with a couple of ladies from church. “Thank you, Gladys, for the flowers,” she said, “they really brighten up the room.”
“Oh, don’t mention it. I just hope you all can use the fruit basket. I’ve always said, ‘Man cannot live by hospital food alone.’”
Grandma laughed and hugged her goodbye. She turned to her other friend and said, “Thank you, Evelyn, for the neck pillow. I would not be able to sleep tonight without it. You are so thoughtful.” They hugged. “I will call you tomorrow.”
Grandma came over to talk with Rusty, Misty, and Mom.
Dad walked out of Grandpa’s room just then. “Boy, wait until I see that doctor. Dad says they gave him that medication he cannot take. I warned the doctor not to! Dad reacted the same way he did the time they gave it to him last time. This time he could have died.”
Continued next time.
_______
Now discuss it!
Why does God give us a church family?
What can you do to be more of a brother and sister to others at your church?
How is your family more important than the church?
Believing family members are a close support team.
How is your church more important than your family?
Close friends at church can be more trustworthy than unbelieving family members. We love in Christ.
If we are a family, who is our Father? How does He feel if we do not get along?
Everyone in God’s family has the Name of Jesus Christ. How should you treat those who call themselves Christians but do not know the truth?
_________
Read God’s Word together:
Losing a Loved Sister
Peter went off on a mission to visit all the churches. In the course of his travels he arrived in Lydda and met with the believers there. He came across a man—his name was Aeneas—who had been in bed eight years paralyzed.
Peter said, “Aeneas, Jesus Christ heals you. Get up and make your bed!” And he did it—jumped right out of bed. Everybody who lived in Lydda and Sharon saw him walking around and woke up to the fact that God was alive and active among them.
Down the road a way in Joppa there was a disciple named Tabitha, “Gazelle” in our language. She was well-known for doing good and helping out. During the time Peter was in the area she became sick and died. Her friends prepared her body for burial and put her in a cool room.
Some of the disciples had heard that Peter was visiting in nearby Lydda and sent two men to ask if he would be so kind as to come over. Peter got right up and went with them.
They took him into the room where Tabitha’s body was laid out. Her old friends, most of them widows, were in the room mourning. They showed Peter pieces of clothing the Gazelle had made while she was with them.
Peter put the widows all out of the room. He knelt and prayed. Then he spoke directly to the body: “Tabitha, get up.”
She opened her eyes. When she saw Peter, she sat up. He took her hand and helped her up. Then he called in the believers and widows, and presented her to them alive.
When this became known all over Joppa, many put their trust in the Master. Peter stayed on a long time in Joppa as a guest of Simon the Tanner.
(Acts 9:32-43, The Message)
_________
Let’s talk about it!
Why do God’s people sometimes become attached to one another?
Because we are close like a family.
If you had family members who were sick, would you try to help them and pray for them?
Should we treat church members the same way?
Is everyone who comes to the church a brother or sister?
No. Some have just started coming.
While we love everyone at the church, what if they do things God does not approve of?
Love them and be patient until they realize their mistake. We should not follow them if they do wrong.
What if a child in the church asks you what to do because his parents are doing really bad things?
Always offer to pray. If the child is in danger, talk to your parents.
What if a friend comes to you and asks for prayer for problems she is having at school?
Role play: You have a close friend at church who stops living for God and lives in sin. Some of your other friends follow his or her example. What do you do?
You have a friend at church who pulls you off into a dark room to show you something. What do you say?
A new child comes to church. He or she does not know anyone. Should you just hang with your friends where you feel safe or should you take a risk and be friendly?
How?
_________
Memorize it!