For DAD Only:
Are You Game for Child Raising?
Some kids grow up hating work because their dad never teaches them how. Others hate work because they have to do all of it. Although some parents swing to the extreme of never demanding anything from their kids, others fly to the other end of the spectrum by demanding that their kids do everything. The age-old question arises again about whether the family is a team or a dictator-oppressed regime.
We have to think of children in an eternal perspective. We are building a legacy which involves more than getting the trash dumped or lawn mowed. These chores should develop character, not burn out our kids.
Children are not pawns on the chessboard of life. They are not expendable crewmen, standing by to do our bidding. Divorced parents often use their children as emotional ploys to get back at the ex-spouse. That’s abuse! Why should a kid get whipped back and forth between two adults who refuse to get along? Maybe the kids should keep the house and make mom and dad move in and out every other week.
Divorced or not, busy parents might exploit their kids, instead of investing in them. Some dads use their child’s warm forehead as an excuse to not go to church. Others use their children by getting them enrolled in things like children’s choir, because they see it as a foot-in-the-door to getting a church position
Realizing that my children are not pawns, I have sought to invest in their lives. I see them as individuals who will one day live their own lives and have their own families. I know that all my kids won’t turn out to be pastors and writers like me. I want to see them become experts at the things that interest them. I want them to develop God’s calling in their lives.
Between diapers and dowry, they all must learn the art of effective work. How I teach them determines how they view it. The style of “You better get this done” and “Why didn’t you do this?” ends up making work-haters, not work-lovers. Diligence develops in the fertile ground of forethought. Plan their work, then let them work the plan.
In the board game of a godly family, the children are not pawns. If anything, the parents are. Children are the Kings and Queens we lay down our lives for, so they can win.
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Dad, share this story with your kids:
Stick to It
“Let’s see how heavy this doghouse is,” Grandpa said.
Rusty picked up the front of the little house he and his grandfather had just made. “I got this end.”
Grandpa picked up the other end.
“That’s not too heavy,” Rusty said. “Where do you want to go with it?”
“Well, let’s take it to the neighbor’s. We have to finish what we started.”
“Boy, I bet they are going to be surprised.”
The garage door was already open, so Rusty and Grandpa walked out into the sunshine.
“This house is going to last a long time,” Rusty said as they worked their way down the sidewalk. “I’m glad we built it right.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Do you think they will be home?”
“I believe so.”
Rusty followed Grandpa up the driveway to the neighbor’s place. They set the doghouse down by the front door and Grandpa knocked.
After a minute a lady in a red sweater answered the door. “Oh, hi,” she said to Grandpa.
“Howdy, neighbor.”
“What are you fellas doing?”
“Well, we turned up having just what we needed to build a doghouse for your pet in the backyard.”
“For Duke?”
“Yes, I noticed him out in the rain the other day. And my grandson and I wanted to do something nice for you all.”
“Well, that is so nice. He will love it, I’m sure. I don’t know what my boy was thinking, bringing me a dog, anyway.”
“So, is it all right if we walk around back and set it up?”
“Sure. I’d invite you to go this way, but I don’t think that doghouse would fit through the door.”
Grandpa nodded. “That’s fine. We’ll just march around and see what the old boy is up to.” He and Rusty picked up the doghouse again and plodded around to the back of the yard.
The curly-haired dog perked up when he saw them and started barking. It ran to the end of its chain and sniffed the air as they approached. Just then the lady came out of the house and told the dog to be nice.
Grandpa and Rusty set the house down and walked over to say high to the pooch. They talked to it and petted it as the owner came out of the house.
“This is so nice of you men. I didn’t know what I was going to do for my little Duke once the weather turned cold.”
“We’re glad to help,” Grandpa said. He and Rusty picked up the house and carried it over to the shade of a tree where the dog could reach it on his chain.
Duke walked over and sniffed at the house. He looked inside. He looked at Rusty and wagged his tail.
“Go on in, boy.”
“Yes, Duke,” the owner lady said, “go in your new house.”
The dog looked inside again and barked.
“It’s okay, boy.”
“I’ll be right back,” the owner said, as she headed back inside.
While she was gone, Rusty picked up the dog’s two bowls. “Grandpa, look. He doesn’t have any food or water.”
“I know, Rusty. My neighbor has a condition that causes her to forget things sometimes. I look in on the dog just about everyday to make sure he’s not been forgotten. She means well, but sometimes she can’t help it.”
“Oh, that’s too bad.”
Just then, Grandpa’s neighbor came back out with a piece of meat in her hand. “Here, Duke. Here, boy, try this,” she said as she threw it inside the new doghouse.
The dog ran into his house to get the treat. He snatched it up and gulped it down. Then he sat down and licked his lips.
“He liked that!” Rusty said.
Duke lay down on the floor.
“Do you like this doghouse that Grandpa and I built for you, Duke?”
“I think he does,” Grandpa said.
“May I get him some food and water?” Rusty asked.
“Oh,” his owner said, “I forgot to do that today. You certainly may. The food is right in the garage and the hose is there on the side of the house.”
When Rusty and Grandpa had finished at the neighbor’s, Grandpa said, “Rusty, there is a Bible verse I want to share with you about what you learned today.” Rusty and Grandpa sat down and read together.
Shortly after Rusty and Grandpa had returned from the neighbor’s house, Mom and Dad came home. Rusty and Misty gathered their things while their parents talked to Grandma and Grandpa. Finally, they all loaded into the van and headed home.
Once they were on the road, Rusty said, “When we get home, I’m going to give the dog a bath.”
“Oh really? What makes you think he needs a bath?”
“Because God wants us to take care of our animals. He wants us to be faithful with the little jobs, all the time.”
“Wow. He sure does. I think you really benefitted from being with Grandma and Grandpa for a few days.”
“Yep. And I’m going to make sure Wiggles gets all the food and water he needs.”
“Without being told?”
“Yes.”
“Everyday?”
“Yes. Even before I get breakfast.”
“Excellent. It sounds like you have learned a good lesson. How did they teach you that?”
“It’s in the Bible. Proverbs twenty-two verse twenty-nine.”
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Is it easier to do a big job once, or a little job everyday?
What big jobs do you like to do?
What little jobs do you like to do?
What daily jobs do you do? Do you ever forget?
What happens if you forget? What can you do so you won’t forget?
What about the verse Rusty learned? What does it say about good persistent work?
Does Jesus care about how we do the little things every day?
If we can learn to do a good job with things now, how will that help us as we grow up and become adults?
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Read the following scripture with the family:
Count the Cost
Luke 14:27-33
And whosoever doth not bear his cross, and come after me, cannot be my disciple.
For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he have sufficient to finish it? Lest haply, after he hath laid the foundation, and is not able to finish it, all that behold it begin to mock him, saying,
This man began to build, and was not able to finish.
Or what king, going to make war against another king, sitteth not down first, and consulteth whether he be able with ten thousand to meet him that cometh against him with twenty thousand? Or else, while the other is yet a great way off, he sendeth an ambassage, and desireth conditions of peace.
So likewise, whosoever he be of you that forsaketh not all that he hath, he cannot be my disciple.
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What did Jesus want people to learn from this story?
What kind of things do we need to plan ahead for and stick with, until the job is done?
Jesus wants us to live for Him. Does this take time and effort everyday, too?
What kind of work can we do for God?
Does this take time and effort for planning ahead of time?
Does it take continual attention?
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I love the expression. Everyone needs to express there own opinion and feel free to hear others. Keep it up :)
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